Very often everyone says that women need to get married before the age of 25, because then no one will call: a new generation of brides will grow up. But researchers argue that, according to statistics, there are much more single men than women. And this figure is growing every year.
And even after divorce, women are far more likely to remarry than men are.
The world is changing, and the number of singles is growing, especially the small chances of finding family happiness in men after 35. We will tell you why this is happening.
In our time, self-doubt does not so much originate in childhood as it is born in the illusionary world of social networks. When young people leaf through the feed with photographs of a beautiful life, they begin to feel inferior and unable to start a family at this stage of their lives. Psychologists seriously raise this topic and advise you to control your time on the Internet.
In addition, men react more painfully to refusal to meet on social networks and on dating sites than women. To increase self-esteem, experts recommend finding a purpose in life and dealing with all of your blocks that prevent you from behaving confidently with women. Also, engage in self-development and be realistic, and not look for the idealized fruit of your fantasies among women.
Whatever it was, but women pay attention to the appearance of a man, because with him to fall asleep all his life and from him give birth to a child. If a man does not wash or iron his clothes, does not clean his shoes and does not visit the hairdresser on time, this is very repulsive. And over the years, the untidiness only becomes more, because a man without a woman lives aimlessly and often puts on what the first comes to hand.
Men need to remember that many of the flaws in their appearance are fixable. And, in the end, the charm and charisma that you can develop in yourself make a person attractive. Therefore, it is worth remembering that a full wallet is not yet a guarantee of attractiveness for women.
Many men complain that they don’t have time for their love life. But do not forget that everyone has 24 hours in a day, and somehow others manage to engage in self-development, career and family. So it’s worth getting into time management and self-discipline.
Many guys think that first, before the age of 25-30, they will make a career, create a material base and start looking for a bride. But you need to work all your life, and a person is so arranged that it is always not enough for him – you can simply not understand when there are already all the benefits for creating a family.
Excessive love for work, according to experts, can hide internal problems behind itself: loading themselves with work, people thereby flee from loneliness, anxiety, and fear. Psychotherapist Irwin Yalom advises overly busy people to stop and ask themselves the question: where are you going and why?
Spending all the time at work, men lose the ability to communicate with the opposite sex, and with young girls they have different views on life, and their peers are either married or self-sufficient and can afford any man.
Previous relationship experience
Let’s say a man has been dating a woman for 5 years, and in the end they divorced. The reasons can be very different: from banal betrayal to the fact that the relationship has simply outlived itself or the woman is tired of waiting. Painful experiences in previous relationships are often the cause of a single lifestyle.
After all, men are very vulnerable on this basis. An interesting observation: the longer a man remains alone after a breakup, the more likely it is to remain single forever. But in a couple, two are always to blame. If all previous relationships have been a failure, you should think about whether it is in you or in the fact that you always choose women with the same set of qualities. And it is worth remembering that youth is fleeting.
Smart people say that it is permissible for men and women to lead a riotous lifestyle until the age of 23, then you need to start building serious relationships.
Fear of responsibility
Every man on a subconscious level understands that family is a big responsibility, and many are afraid of it. Often these are people who find it difficult to make important decisions, or they are used to overprotective parental care, or have many opportunities and choices. The latter is a paradox of our time and does not help in life, but, on the contrary, makes us unhappy.
Psychologists say that there are many reasons for fear of taking responsibility: fear of making a mistake, fear of competition, fear of failure, low self-esteem, and even genetics.
The habit of living alone
Prolonged loneliness becomes a habit. It is even difficult for a person to imagine that someone can share personal space with him. It often happens that a man of 35–40 years old can have a girlfriend, date her for more than a year, but he does not call her to live together. He’s just better off alone.
If 20 years ago there were clear roles in the family: the husband is the breadwinner, the wife is the hostess, now a man and a woman can live happily independently of each other. There are also many temptations and entertainment that young people can afford. And they postpone marriage for later. But then they can no longer give up their freedom. Yes, they can suffer and even drink in the evenings because of loneliness, but they can no longer take a responsible step.
It used to be that a man had a better position after a divorce than a woman. But the time has changed. The courts are more often on the side of the woman. In addition, she took place as a mother and can easily find a job for herself, and in the future, a new husband. Alimony hangs on the man. Unmarried girls are no longer very eager to consider such a candidate, and divorced women already know exactly what they want and see if it is suitable for life.
They say that family values are crumbling. Men and women now know that the world is full of opportunities and do not want to waste their time building families. They have children, but do not live together, build houses, but spend time alone. Nowadays, many seek to create the illusion of happiness, but few actually experience it. Perhaps there is nothing wrong with being alone, but still a person needs a person. And often people cannot build strong relationships due to many psychological trauma.