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Mar 30, 2021
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What single mothers must deal with on a daily basis

What single mothers must deal with on a daily basis

It is known that since 2000 the number of single mothers has increased significantly. Some, due to certain circumstances, are simply forced to raise their children alone.

However, many women of the XXI century independently decide to live and raise children without the participation of a man (father). And there are many reasons for this decision. But today we will not talk about the reasons, but about the consequences of such a decision.

Often, attempts to combine career and motherhood cause only a chronic feeling of fatigue, which is very difficult to get rid of later.

Today we will try to figure out why sometimes motherhood takes away the last strength and how to overcome the chronic feeling of fatigue that has arisen as a result of constant employment.

For an illustrative example, we share with you the story of one of our readers.

“I have always strived to be the perfect mother for my triplets. For 5 years, all my efforts have been directed to creating comfortable conditions for my kids. I was confident that their happiness and well-being would automatically become my own. But over the past year, all my works seemed to have lost all meaning … ”- says 36-year-old Angelina.

“When the boys were first born, my husband and I were an exemplary couple. Many of our acquaintances were jealous of us, because it was practically impossible to find a happier family in the district.

But already 2 years later, our relationship with my husband gradually began to deteriorate. And when the sons celebrated their fourth birthday, petty domestic quarrels turned into real scandals, and I decided to file for divorce.

The husband unexpectedly quickly agreed, so that soon he had already packed his things and moved out to another apartment. To be honest, at first this kind of behavior just stunned me. I could not understand how he so easily managed to give up everything that we built and created together. However, after some time, mutual acquaintances confessed to me that for a year he had had an affair on the side, so everything immediately fell into place …

My ex-husband’s lies made me so angry that I forbade him to see the children. For some time he still tried to offer me some kind of help, but I just could not accept it. I think many will understand why …

Quite a long time has passed since then. The insult was forgotten, but the offer of help more and more often pops up in my memory. I love my guys very much, but every year it becomes more and more difficult for me to carry everything on myself. And home, and work, and education …

I’m just terribly tired of coping with everything alone. But at the same time, I can’t even imagine how, after so much time, ask for help from someone with whom I was so harsh in the past ”

Taking care of even one child is incredible effort. What can we say about triplets! As for our heroine, I would like to advise her to forget about doubts and accept help from the boys’ father. It is obvious that the ex-husband is ready to take care of the children and the only reason why he has not done this until now is the categorical refusal of their mother.

Of course, sometimes it is difficult to get rid of prejudices, past grievances or give up your pride. But anything happens in life and each of us needs to learn to accept it and try to adapt as much as possible to all life changes.

It is worth understanding that without taking time to yourself, you will not be able to properly take care of your children. After all, physical and psychological fatigue simply will not allow you to do this.

There are situations when you don’t have to wait for help from the child’s father. But even in this case, in the environment of every woman there are relatives and friends on whom you can rely.

Don’t be shy about asking your parents or friends for help. Of course, they all have their own worries, their kindness should not be abused in any way. However, sometimes you just need to ask someone for support and give yourself time to relax a little.

Modern women tend to overestimate their capabilities. Often we just don’t want to admit that we are not coping with something and are afraid to ask for help. We are afraid to be misunderstood or to seem bad (irresponsible, dependent, and so on). But the truth is, everyone has a right to rest and support from loved ones.

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