Loneliness is a bad habit. It seems to many that loneliness is fate, but in fact it is our choice. Or rather, the result of cultivating those character traits that are not compatible with happiness.
The deficit of ordinary human communication is not compensated in any way by material benefits, social status, and various achievements. Let’s figure out what really makes us lonely.
Waiting for the first step
Feel free to show your feelings, emotions, sympathy. This is called “taking a step forward.” You don’t have to take drastic steps. A woman need not be the first to ask a man out on a date. But flirting is recommended, this is a powerful impetus for the development of relationships.
In any case, if you sit in a corner and do nothing, nothing will happen.
Perhaps you are a punctual, neat, tidy person who has everything in its place. You plan your life without deviating from the planned plan even a step.
But the people who come across you may be intimidated by your desire to control them as well. After all, control has nothing to do with love and is not always appropriate in a relationship.
No matter how old you are, grumpiness adds a ten to your age. Stop being a grouch. A person who is constantly dissatisfied with something and is tuned in to the negative does not dispose people to himself.
The scourge of modern society. When was the last time you met in person and not on social media? Anyone who spends too much time in the virtual world breaks the habit of the real.
The desire to please everyone
When you become that comfortable person who does not know how to say “no”, then you will cease to be happy. It is much better to have a number of real friends and faithful companions in life, rather than opportunists who are looking for benefits and for an imaginary friendship or relationship choose “rescuers” who are ready to help and sacrifice themselves at any time.
Build reasonable personal boundaries. When you learn to listen to your desires, those around you will begin to appreciate you as a whole person who does not adapt to everyone, losing his own look.
Inability to fulfill obligations
When building personal boundaries, make sure that your actions do not harm others. If you promised something to another – do it, start a business – complete it, borrow money – give it back on time, and so on …
Do not forget about those with whom you promised to meet. It’s better to apologize over the phone if you’re late than to lose a good relationship. That is, while respecting your boundaries, be sure to respect the boundaries of others.
Lack of hobbies
A hobby helps to grow from the inside, to become an integral, self-sufficient person who will be interesting to others. If you are not fond of anything, with burning eyes, with sincere interest, you do not live. A hobby will help you attract like-minded people into your life.
The reasons for a person’s loneliness can lie in his apathy for everything in this life. You need to find at least something that encourages to create and create.
Active search for the “prince”
The reasons for the loneliness of women are that they are looking for a non-existent ideal. Too arrogant, arrogant, unable to consider the positive in those who are around.
They believe that “the same man” will make them happy and will solve all-all everyday problems. In fact, they are looking for an excuse for their depression and shifting responsibility for their own inner state onto someone else.
It’s okay to share your experiences. An understanding person will support, sympathize, help in some way. It is quite another matter to constantly complain about life. You can’t do that, it’s repulsive.
When the job is bad, the government is bad, and the parents are bad, and the housing and even the sun is shining too brightly, the question arises: “Why not try to change at least something, you see, and you don’t have to complain? ”
You only need to compare yourself with your former self. Envy is hard to hide. When the achievements of others are annoying or discouraging, those around them stop talking about all the good things that happen to them. Communication gradually stops.