This article is dedicated to those who are going through a difficult stage in their relationship – parting. During such a period, despair alternates with misunderstanding. What to do next? Should you try to start over or turn around and leave forever?
A problem like this inflicts deep wounds on the peace of mind. And it arises both by accident and through someone else’s fault. You need to get rid of a heavy burden – this is the main rule. And this can be done in different ways.
Either you persist and try to rebuild the relationship, or you gather willpower and let go of the situation. But it should be borne in mind that some couples are very fragile due to their character. Therefore, a short-term break in such cases is a common thing. And it is very important to be able to show your true feelings and reverently treats a loved one in this case. We will give you some consistent tips on how to best restore your relationship and live happily!
1. Remember the person you loved from the very beginning.
We all change over time. And your partner is no exception. Try to remind yourself how he was from the beginning and how you felt when you first met. Later you will understand that it was your future life and relationships that changed you. It could be a routine family life, some little things, etc. Try to abstract yourself from this and again love the person who won your heart from the very beginning. All those qualities that once made an impression are still there! You just need to get them out.
Remember the first date, romantic walks, memorable dates. Resurrect it and take your soul mate on a journey through a happy past time. This is where looking back is helpful. Flip through your photo album together and talk.
The whole problem is that most people begin to relax in relationships. Having lived for more than one year together, the feeling of struggle disappears. And it shouldn’t disappear! You need to get out of your comfort zone and again make it clear to your partner that he is still loved the same way. In such cases, light flirting, innocent teasing, and anything else that can maintain a cheerful atmosphere in the house helps. Relationship work never ends. It’s difficult, but why then start if you were not ready for it?
Simply put, treat your loved one the same way you would on the first date. Don’t lose your touch of romance. And you can regain lost feelings.
2. Stop fighting and learn to forgive.
Long-term quarrels and even the most insignificant disputes sooner or later infuriate. Relationships suffer a lot from this and things get much worse. Offensive words and raised tone hurt anyone. And even more so – close. If you want to restore your old feelings, then it’s time to stop it. Be smarter and learn to forgive. No loving person will hurt his chosen one. And you shouldn’t!
Think clearly and don’t let your emotions take over. Think about the consequences and begin to forgive. There is no need to aggravate an already difficult situation with rudeness. Of course, there are things that cannot be forgiven. But if these are domestic quarrels or differences of opinion, then a compromise is reached in any case. Understand that by insulting the person who loves you, you are causing him mental trauma.
Even if your partner does not understand what he is saying, this is not a reason to respond in kind. Hold on to your last strength if you have to! Become the water for the blazing fire. Learn to control the course of events or just keep silent once more. Later, when emotions have subsided, take the initiative and discuss the problem calmly. Everything is solved much easier than you think. And later, both of you will realize that the whole past quarrel was just a misunderstanding.
3. Time for communication
This way of solving problems overlaps with the first. But if in that case the problem is due to a general loss of feelings and interest in each other, then in this case it is a lack of proper communication. Many do not even realize how important it is to understand the facet of this or that type of interaction between partners. To put it simply, you need to put aside all the problems along with emotions and start speaking in simple and understandable words. No insults! In the event that you do not understand what is happening, you need to put yourself in the shoes of your partner and support him. Perhaps he is just experiencing some problem that he did not have time or did not want to tell you about. Have patience and be kind enough to iron out any little misunderstandings. And they often develop into a difficult parting.
There is no need to worry if your loved one wants to take a walk in the park, jump from a parachute or take off on a long trip. Just be there. Try to find at least some kind of compromise. If you do not accept the wishes of your partner, then he will answer you in kind. And this is not the most successful development of relations. This is especially true for resentful people who can sink because of loneliness and misunderstanding. A sense of uselessness develops in them, which is why they leave.
4. Rebuild Your Trust
It is important for each partner to understand that they are loved. Allow them to feel again the emotions that overwhelmed them at the very beginning of the relationship. No one can make it clear to your partner that he is loved better than you. Not friends, not family, not even this article! The only one who is capable of this is yourself. Goodbye, love and support your partner. That’s all it takes.
Get rid of your own ego at least for this period. Don’t think that learning to forgive or apologize makes you weaker. On the contrary, it lightens a heavy burden and helps you build long-term relationships. There is no need to be proud of yourself, do not ask for the impossible and do not think that if you asked for help it is pointless. This is not true! Joint participation in problems is a sign of mutual understanding and trust. Even if you had to shed tears, this is not weakness.
And if a loved one cries, comfort him. Of course, this will not solve the problem, but it will give confidence that you still love him. Care and affection speak volumes without words. And no one else can do it better than you. In this case, it is important to show emotions and direct them in the right direction. Each of us is pleased to feel cared for and that it is still possible to return, despite all the disagreements.
Bring back your confidence with an invitation to a romantic dinner. No need to plan ahead. Do it spontaneously! Just stay together and communicate. We all tend to make mistakes, but we need to be able to correct them, and not sit with folded hands.
As a last resort, convince yourself that you are all from the same person as before. That nothing has changed, because once everyone was happy. We’ve talked about this before, and believe me, it’s not that difficult. Yes, this is easier said than done. But isn’t it worth at least trying to get everything back? Restore the little world you once lived in. And they were happy.
Love is not just a feeling, but love is a choice. And having decided to let him into your life, bear responsibility for this. Do your best to preserve what filled you with meaning once upon a time. Nobody canceled the second chance. No need to chop on the vine, let us pass the time and act decisively! Something has kept you together all these years, so it’s worth fighting for again.
Give each other a chance and don’t be too harsh.
Peace won’t come in just one day. It will probably take a lot of effort to bring back the past. But don’t give up! Help each other remember happy moments. Let go of the past and live in the present, not forgetting how bright the future can be!