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Oct 17, 2021
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Dear father, spin like a groovy

Dear father, spin like a groovy

Photo: DPA / Picture-alliance

Father’s Day is celebrated for the first time in Russia on October 17. From now on, every third Sunday in October is reserved for men with children. However, can this change the attitude towards them and strengthen the institution of the family in the country?

President of Russia Vladimir Putin signed a decree to celebrate Father’s Day without declaring it a day off. As stated in the text of the document, “in order to strengthen the institution of the family and increase the importance of fatherhood in the upbringing of children.” The decree of the head of state, as well as the amendments to the Constitution, where last year it was finally prescribed that the state protects not only family, motherhood and childhood, but also fatherhood, can be called not only timely. Rather – long-awaited and in many respects belated.

But in order to understand this topic seriously, one must know not only the beautiful words in the decrees and the basic law, but also look at the legislation and law enforcement practice in general. And also, more importantly, it is necessary to objectively look at the real state of affairs in the country.

Firstly, today in Russia a huge number of children are brought up in single-parent families. Simply because in recent years the number of divorces and marriages has averaged 70 per 100, and in some regions these figures have even become equal. That is, the traditional and previously familiar model that a man and a woman live together and raise children together practically does not exist.

Of course, children suffer the most from this. It is one thing for adults to meet and run away. And it is completely different when children cannot fully communicate with their parents. Since in about 90-95% of cases the children are left with their mothers, this is also a tragedy for the fathers. And the fact that they want to educate their children, say about 300 thousand appeals to the court annually.

A typical situation – after the divorce, the ex-wife left for another city. Or, you have to get a meeting with a child with the help of bailiffs. Just a couple of hours a week, and that’s the best case scenario.

In addition, divorced fathers are still subject to alimony. Nobody argues that children should be taken care of. But any normal and adequate man should not be forced to do this. If a child needs clothes, food, books, toys, why not buy it? But the alimony system is designed in such a way that the money must be given to the ex-wife, who can spend it at her discretion. And she either does not allow the father to the child at all, or through the bailiffs. Moreover, he sets him up against a man whose only fault is that he previously participated in the birth of children.

It is not surprising that many refuse to pay alimony. Including very wealthy people. Now there are 1.5 million cases in the country on the collection of defaulters. They describe their property, are not allowed to go abroad, and can even be brought under a criminal article.

Joint upbringing could change this state of affairs, primarily in the interests of children. And in many countries it is a practice when a child lives with his mother, and then a week with his father. Both parents provide for the child and, what is important, participate in his upbringing.

And of course, it is difficult to talk about preserving the family and respecting fathers, when in general the legislation is discriminatory towards men. Take, for example, the different retirement ages, given that men live in Russia almost ten years less than women. In developed countries, this gap is only two to three years. Pay attention to our courtyards. They have many grandmothers and almost no grandfathers.

And there is also a conscript army, when at the age of 18 they can catch, shave their heads, put on boots and send them to the Arctic Ocean. And criminal offenses are punished in different ways. All this together leads to the fact that Russia ranks first in the world in the number of male suicides per 100 thousand population. They just feel unnecessary.

Deputy of the State Duma, Actual State Councilor Evgeny Fedorov believes that the introduction of Father’s Day will still contribute to strengthening social foundations:

– The presidential decree is aimed at strengthening the family. The emphasis is on what a family is. That is, this is mom, father. But we must honestly say that there is serious pressure on Russia from abroad. Recently, the Europeans said that Russia is not following their recommendations on gender policy. The implication is that we must follow their instructions. And the point is that children must be brought up differently, that they have the right to choose their gender. But traditional concepts such as family, father, mother have already become the object of struggle. And the struggle is going on in the international arena. Now the president has taken a step in the right direction. True, the government took a step back at the same time, proposing not to register the presence of a family in the passport.

“SP”: – What legislative acts need to be adopted, that the institution of the family in Russia should be strengthened? First of all, we are talking about such a thing as alimony slavery.

“I don’t understand the very word“ slavery ”. If people have given birth to children, they must support them until the age of 18. This is enshrined in legislation and monitored. Additionally, it is necessary to introduce support for children and families. Maternity capital has already been introduced, but before it was not there. And this measure significantly raised the birth rate, strengthened families. The mother’s capital also strengthened the role of the mother as a person who participates in family building and makes decisions. It is necessary to pursue a different policy regarding abortion, that is, to start protecting the child from the moment of his formation as a person, and this happens before birth. Now the law protects a person after birth. In general, Russia needs to pursue its policy, regardless of foreign law and instructions.

“SP”: – Russian legislation as a whole is rather discriminatory in relation to men. Is there an opportunity to somehow change the situation?

– I do not consider the legislation to be discriminatory. It just reflects the essence of a man. A man is different from a woman, and this is reflected to some extent in the laws. Including with regard to labor relations. There is no discrimination there, but the attitude towards men and women is different, because they themselves are different. And the essence of our laws is that a man and a woman are different. But the Americans are pushing that they are the same to the point of confusion. Even to the level of gender reassignment, which can be done almost ten times in a lifetime.

Or, let’s say, the question of children. Children are still like mothers. By the way, our law allows the father to be responsible for raising children. But in most cases, this is not the case. Although there are cases that the mother refuses children and pays child support. It’s just that the practice is such that the mother is usually responsible for the children. And she should receive help not only from the state, but also from her father.

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