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Nov 11, 2021
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10 free tips people pay big bucks to psychologists for

10 free tips people pay big bucks to psychologists for

We will be happy to share with you the most popular tips from psychologists.

These tips work for the bulk of clients, and there are situations in which an individual approach is needed in a personal consultation.

1. Most of the problems are from childhood. Look at your parents

What is their behavior model? What are their motives? There are a colossal number of theories that provide an answer to the question of why your current problem has legs growing out of childhood. By explaining to yourself why mom or dad did this, you can understand and forgive them, and this is a huge step towards accepting yourself as you already are.

2. The rest of the problems are out of my head

Internal dialogues on the topic “I should have answered him that way” or “he did this because …” are of no use. We cannot explain the actions of other people: they grew up in different conditions, they have a completely different experience from ours. Therefore, thinking out the motives of actions is creating problems for oneself.

3. Talk more about your feelings, evaluate others less

“I suffer a lot from what you did to me.”
“What did I do?”
And how can you refrain from assessing the situation? And it should be. Telling a person what he is wrong for, you accuse him, and he is forced to defend himself. And by talking about your feelings, you give the person a chance to correct the situation while maintaining their dignity, or the opportunity to explain their position.

4. Think more about yourself, think less about the assessments of others

Comparing yourself to others is a lost cause. Again, everyone has their own baggage of knowledge and material wealth, their own type of figure and psychotype, their own desires and achievements. To peep an idea from others is constructive, this is how we form our desires. But copying someone’s life is destructive, you have to live your own.

5. Get out of your comfort zone

The council works for all walks of life. If you want to find a husband – go on dates, change jobs – go to interviews, find your purpose – try whatever is interesting … Whatever a person wants to change, he will have to leave his comfort zone.

6. Set boundaries and don’t let them be violated

Most often, clients of psychologists are looking for solutions in the field of interaction with other people: a mother-in-law who harasses, a tyrant boss, teenage children … And the advice to set boundaries and not allow anyone to cross them is 50% of the solution to all problems.

If you tolerate a swinish attitude towards yourself, nothing will change. Fight back the violator of your borders – you will at least arouse the respect of the enemy.

7. Take a small step every day.

The habit is developed for 20 days and the same number of days is fixed. Psychologists are well aware of such features of our brain, so they recommend taking a small, but small step in the right direction. Can’t thank your husband? Write down his good deeds for the day on a piece of paper, and even if you fail to say a kind word, you will still see that he is not so bad.

8. Think about what you learned from this situation.

Any stressful situation is a way out of your comfort zone. This means that you have received a new experience, and the new experience must be rethought in order to either not get into the same situation again, or to make it controllable.

If you are late for work and did not receive an award, there is an obvious direct connection, and if, for example, you want to understand relationships with other people, then you need to think it over in order to understand how to resolve the situation.

9. Let go of the situation

In your efforts to change something, it is very important not to overdo it. If your family has problems and you know what exactly needs to be changed, then change it, but do not demand the same from other family members.

You can change yourself and let go of the situation, or you can forcefully teach your family and drive your family into stress. Take your pick.

10. Do not be your own executioner, be a friend

You need to be able to accept defeat and the inability to influence something important to you, get upset about it and even be sad. The main thing is not to remember this time later as wasted.

Stopping on a path or a crossroads is to digest the experience gained and choose the right path.

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